


Crossing Lines

by Tarlan



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Angst, Drama, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-01-01
Updated: 2007-01-01
Packaged: 2017-10-21 04:09:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 20,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/220747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tarlan/pseuds/Tarlan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Someone is playing practical jokes, except no one is laughing once they become more dangerous. John needs to get to the bottom of it before someone dies, especially as that someone might be Rodney.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Crossing Lines

**Author's Note:**

  * For [moonlettuce (Claire)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Claire/gifts).



> This story was originally written for the _sga_santa_ challenge. Dedicated to **Moonlettuce** who requested... _McShep. Or a McKay/Sheppard/Lorne threesome. Jealous!Sheppard. Oblivious!Rodney. All of them acting like guys and not twelve-year old girls. Things I wouldn't like: Het. Kids. An unhappy ending._
> 
> I hope you enjoyed your gift!

"What the hell happened here?" John ordered, his eyes moving from one marine to the next, lingering on none but making sure they knew he was talking to each of them. He wanted an answer and it had better be a good one. He caught the slight movement from the corner of his eye and turned to Sergeant Halston.

"Well?" John's eyes narrowed because Halston was already on his list of people to ship back to Earth on the _Daedalus_ at the earliest opportunity. The marine was a misfit of the worst kind, someone who should never have made it through even the most basic of the stringent SGC security checks let alone through the entire selection process. The name dropping had given John his first inkling that the process was not quite as honest as it ought to be. Halston was some ranking officer's kid or nephew, or a favor for a friend. What he wasn't, was good SGC material. The man had little tolerance for the backward natives they met in the Pegasus galaxy and even less for the scientists on the expedition, who made far easier targets. Most likely, the man hated the fact that the majority of people in Atlantis were one hell of a lot smarter than he was, and he resented them for it.

Until recently, though, Halston had saved his attitude for the lower ranking scientists but, since Arcturus, he seemed to have set his sights on a much bigger fish--the geek king of Atlantis, Rodney McKay. John felt partly to blame for that because he had made his displeasure with McKay common knowledge. Their interaction had always suffered from sharp teasing but, since Doranda, he knew his comments had taken on a harsher edge. They did not sit down to eat together anymore, nor did they socialize outside of work situations. However, that did not give anyone else the right to treat McKay with disrespect, and certainly did not give anyone the right to haze the guy right into the infirmary.

Halston offered a snide grin. "McKay had been on my case all morning, sir. Perhaps someone figured it was time to show him exactly who was boss around here."

"And by someone, you mean you."

"No, Sir. I was on gate duty when the accident happened." His eyes narrowed slightly. "Permission to speak candidly?" John nodded. "I'm not condoning what happened but those geeks have got to learn a little respect for the guys who stand between them and the Wraith."

John saw one or two nods and felt a sour taste in his mouth as he wondered how many more of his men felt that they had taken an unfair brunt of the action when facing the Wraith. The ones who nodded had not been on Atlantis during the siege. They had not seen the scientists spending every waking minute working on building defenses within the city, with some remaining to fight right alongside the soldiers when the Wraith arrived. They had not been part of the clean-up crew that helped remove the desiccated bodies of scientists, soldiers and Athosians who had been fed upon during the final battle as the Wraith beamed into the city. They had not helped to count the missing; the ones who would never be recovered.

That they had lost only forty-three people was a testament to the courage and determination of them all, civilian and soldier alike. Through it all, none had worked harder and longer than McKay. He was the one who had figured out a way to send a last message back to Earth. He was the one who had been the driving force behind getting the Ancient La Grange satellite back online, leaving them with one less hive ships heading towards them. And it was Rodney's completed Genii nuclear bomb and not Zelenka's that had taken out a second hive ship, though John would never remind him of that fact because McKay had suffered enough nightmares for weeks following the siege, with his mind and body tearing apart from the stress, the lack of sleep and from the drugs that had kept him going.

John's thoughts came back to those marines fresh off the _Daedalus_. Perhaps he only needed to straighten them out but, in truth, he was disappointed that he even needed to consider it. His eyes slid to one side where Major Lorne stood stock-still with eyes revealing none of his inner feelings.

There was a time when Lorne had little respect for McKay too but John thought that had changed over the past months. McKay might not be the first to jump into the fray but he could be relied upon to be there when the chips were down. After all, McKay could have stayed in the safety of Atlantis rather than follow Lorne and the others into an Iratus bug nest for there was no scientific need that warranted him placing his life into danger. Plus McKay had been right to moan about the radiation on that world where they found and then lost Ford again. Perhaps it had not been so damaging to others but Beckett had sworn heartily in front of Lorne and the others when he discovered McKay had been on the planet surface during most of the strong daylight hours, and without the full suit, having left the helmet beside Lorne's stunned body. In fact, Beckett had forced everyone to take a turn under the Ancient's device for dealing with low-grade radiation poisoning after that day on 'radiation death world', with McKay returning for treatment every day for a week.

As usual, most people assumed McKay had been playing the hypochondriac but John knew better. McKay had moaned often enough about how much radiation he had been exposed to over his life and, as much as John hated to admit it, flying close to the corona of a sun and spending time with the Genii nuclear prototype bombs had not done the man any extra favors.

"I say again. What happened?"

"He fell, Sir."

John spun around to face the marine who had spoken up. "Corporal Ericsson?"

Ericsson swallowed and stood straighter. "Doctor McKay tripped and fell, sir."

"On what?"

"I don't know, Sir."

Halston piped up again. "Look, Sir. The geek took a tumble but he's obviously well enough to whine at you and Beckett so--"

John saw Lorne's eye twitch but this time he recognized the barely concealed anger at Halston's words.

"Exactly what did Doctor McKay trip on? And that's an order, soldier."

Silence.

John could see that most had no idea what had happened but the smug look on Halston's face had not altered in the slightest. Obviously, he knew far more than he was letting on but John had no evidence to call him on. He felt the anger riding high within him because McKay could not recall anything just prior to his fall down a short flight of stairs either but, with McKay, that was not so surprising as he had a tendency to walk around the city with his head buried in whatever data had caught his attention. Beckett wanted to keep McKay in the infirmary overnight for observation but, other than the small memory loss, McKay did seem fine and was, in fact, bitching about his so-called incarceration already.

John took in a deep breath and let it out slowly, knowing he had no evidence to assume anything more sinister than a stupid accident had occurred despite Halston's smugness. Perhaps McKay would recall something more after sleeping off the worst of his admittedly light concussion and the accompanying bad headache. John could only be grateful that his injuries were minimal. Considering the fall, he could have broken his stupid neck, and wouldn't that be a great day for Atlantis.

He pursed his lips, knowing he would get no more out of the men standing rigidly to attention before him. "Dismissed."

John watched as all but Lorne saluted, turned and walked away, his eyes narrowing questioningly. "Major?"

"Permission to speak freely."

"Yeah, go ahead."

"There was a series of similar hazing events back in the SGC, and Halston always seemed to be connected peripherally but nothing could ever be proved."

John nodded, not surprised in the slightest as Halston seemed pretty confident with whatever had happened. "Anyone badly hurt?"

Lorne shook his head. "Just annoyances, minor injuries and scares, which stopped after Dr. Jackson met with an unfortunate accident concerning glue and his glasses. Strangely enough, Halston left the SGC for one of the alpha sites shortly after that incident. I think General O'Neill might have had something to do with that."

"I can imagine," John drawled. O'Neill struck him as the kind of man who would look out for his friends and teammates. "Recommendation?"

Lorne's lips curled in slight distaste. "Halston's a good soldier to have at your back in a fight but, otherwise, the man's trouble...and if he's escalating..."

Lorne trailed off and John nodded, knowing it was already a big jump from a few harmless pranks on some of the Atlantis scientists to shoving the top geek down a flight of stairs.

"Then we don't want him around our geeks. Draw up the paperwork to get him sent back to Earth."

"Yes, sir." Lorne offered a basic salute even though John had made it pretty clear that it wasn't necessary when it was just the two of them but it showed Lorne had a lot of respect and agreement for the order given. John watched him until he turned the corner and then he walked to the closest transporter, hitting the destination closest to the infirmary. As the doors opened, John's lips twitched as McKay's less than 'dulcet tones' drifted along the corridor through the open doorway of the infirmary, followed by exasperation from Beckett.

"You took a wee knock on the head, Rodney."

"I fail to see how that should stop me from working on the power distribution equations--"

"You can barely focus on that tablet and, no, I'm not upping the painkillers just so you can work yourself into a coma."

"Colonel! Please kindly explain to our resident witchdoctor that I am perfectly--"

"I wouldn't insult the guy with the enemas, McKay." John interrupted smoothly. Beckett's lips had tightened and he had crossed his arms over his chest in annoyance, ready to start his own tirade against McKay but those lips twitched at John's words. John noted that McKay had mirrored Beckett's cross-armed stance during their disagreement on his treatment but his blue eyes widened fractionally before false bravado overtook his motor-mouth again.

"I'm fine, Carson."

"No, you're not. You fell down a flight of stairs and can'nae recall what happened..."

"Four stairs," McKay interrupted.

"Four stairs too many...and that's not bloody fine."

John felt a tiny surge of inexplicable annoyance when Beckett reached out and placed a hand on Rodney's rigid shoulder, leaning down to gaze intently at Rodney, looking him straight in the eye.

"I know you've a fair bit of a headache so why don't you just lie back, close your eyes and take a nap."

John heard Rodney sigh softly as some of the tension left him but, for some reason, the sight of Beckett's fingers curled over Rodney's shoulder was wrong, as was the way the fingertips caressed the bare flesh of his throat not covered by the infirmary scrub top. Since Doranda, Rodney had spent a lot of time in Beckett's company, time that he might normally have spent with John and the team. John had seen them in the mess hall together at least twice a day, especially at breakfast where they would walk in only minutes apart as if they had timed it *not* to arrive together. He'd seen the way Beckett would badger at Rodney, stealing food off Rodney's plate, sharing parts of his meal like an old married couple. It was wrong. McKay had no right to be enjoying anyone else's company. John narrowed his eyes and twisted his lips.

"I'm gonna go see if Zelenka has pulled up anything on the security cameras."

"Why?"

John felt astonishment at McKay's question. "You may be annoying and irritating..."

"Oh, a compliment. Not had many of those recently," he exclaimed sarcastically.

"...and get distracted by shiny... stuff and twinkling lights."

"As if you don't," he harrumphed.

John smirked. "...but you're not that clumsy on your feet, McKay."

"Gee thanks! Which means?" He made to roll his eyes in annoyance but winced instead. John could bet that headache was killing him right now especially as he was ignoring Beckett's advice to rest.

"Maybe someone finally made good on a promise to sling your ass down a staircase."

McKay's half-smirk froze on his face and then slowly faded as he tensed up again despite Beckett's hand still lying on his shoulder in reassurance. "Someone tried to kill me?"

"It's a possibility."

Wild-eyed fear gave way to annoyance. "Oh goody! Not only do I have to watch my back for the Wraith and the Genii, but now for my own people too."

Beckett looked horrified. "Do you really think somebody tried to kill Rodney?"

John felt a little uncomfortable, knowing he had worried both doctors for no good reason other than a suspicion and a little pettiness in wanting to see McKay suffer a little more. "No. I think someone just went a little too far on a prank."

"Oh that's just great. I can imagine my epitaph now. Here lies Rodney McKay. He managed to escape having the life sucked out of him by space vampires only to slip and break his neck on a banana peel. Ha ha de ha."

"Now Rodney," Beckett admonished, squeezing his shoulder gently and gaining a grumpy but comforted response. John felt his muscles tense again, crushing a terrible urge to slap Beckett's hand away from Rodney's shoulder but, instead, he turned and walked away without another word. As he crossed the threshold, dodging around one of Rodney's minions who'd come to accost him even in the infirmary, John's sensitive hearing picked out Beckett's reassuring words to Rodney.

"I'm sure he'll come round soon."

McKay's response was lost as John carried on down the corridor but he did not need to be a genius to figure out what that was all about. After Arcturus, McKay had made his apology and John had told him he would have to re-earn his trust, except it was all a lie. McKay had never lost his trust in the first place because they all knew the stakes when they went into that project and John should have stepped in earlier when he realized that it was all going to hell. Instead, he had wanted to believe that McKay could fix it and complete something that even the Ancients had given up on. What had angered John was not McKay's insistence that he could do it, because McKay's arrogance and self-confidence in his mental acuity had never been an unknown factor. No, what had hurt was his own desperation to see this weapon work and to see the Wraith defeated. He had awoken them fifty years earlier than anyone in this galaxy predicted but, worse, he carried the guilt of not finding Sumner soon enough. If he had acted faster then perhaps he might have reached Sumner before the colonel was forced to reveal the existence of a whole galaxy filled with tasty snacks on legs for the Wraith. Convinced that they had an endless food supply, the Wraith had fallen upon the worlds of Pegasus galaxy like a plague of locusts, killing countless millions of human beings who might otherwise have escaped the cullings. The only consolation was that they had almost feasted themselves into extinction, unless they could find a way to reach Earth and the Milky Way galaxy.

Unfortunately, Atlantis provided them with the only gateway to the smorgasbord in the Milky Way so the key to keeping their home galaxy safe lie in keeping Atlantis safe--or destroying Atlantis. As John had no intention of seeing the city blown into a trillion tiny pieces, and scattered across the bottom of the vast ocean, the Arcturus weapon had seemed like a godsend... until everything went wrong.

Once in the transporter, John reached out to select the destination that would take him to the control tower but slapped his hand down on the wall beside it instead. Why didn't he just admit the goddamned truth that he didn't care half as much about the Wraith or either galaxy? What had pissed him off was his failure to protect Rodney. Elizabeth had warned him that Rodney could become so focused on his work that he failed to recognize when to stop, and John had promised that he would look out for him; he had almost failed in that duty. His desperation to see the weapon work had overshadowed his responsibility towards McKay and he had almost left it too late. He'd almost killed both of them, and it galled that he was beholden to Caldwell for pulling their asses out of the firing line.

John rubbed his forehead, closing his eyes against the headache forming behind them. He knew it was unfair to blame McKay for all that had happened. Hell, even Zelenka had forgiven McKay for his outburst denigrating the other scientist.

Unconsciously, he scratched at the small patch of discolored flesh from Ellia's feeding attempt. Despite John's coolness towards him, McKay had been there for him throughout the bug ordeal. John had not allowed him to come close but that had not stopped McKay from taking risks in order to help save him. Two of John's men had died on that first attempt to harvest Iratus embryos but it could easily have been all of them. It could have been Rodney left behind in the cave with bugs swarming all over him. John gave a shudder at the mental image. He hated bugs, and especially those bugs, but he hated the thought of losing McKay even more.

Three hours later, John had to give up. The security cameras showed McKay walking towards the stairs with his head buried in his tablet PC and then tripping near the top. All in all, John watched the footage four times, once in slow motion, and he flinched with every viewing; his fingers clenching with the urge to reach out and grab McKay, to haul him back from the edge. His lower lip felt raw from where he chewed on it upon seeing McKay's flailing arms and then unconscious body lying at the base of the stairs, the tablet PC in pieces around him. Yet, no matter how many times he looked, the angle was too steep to see what had toppled McKay and, for all John knew, the man could have tripped over his shoelaces. In exasperation, John filed his report as an accident even though his sixth sense was screaming at him that it was a deliberate attack. He could only be grateful that the flight had been one of the short ones consisting of only four steps, not wanting to imagine how much worse it could have been if McKay had fallen from the top of the gate room stairs.

The following day, John watched from a distance as McKay left the infirmary, biting hard into his lower lip in self-punishment for not being the one to accompany him to his quarters. Instead, he watched as Beckett kept up a steady banter in his soft Scots accent, with his hand at McKay's elbow guiding him as they moved to the closest transporter. John felt a gnawing and seething inside his heart and gut as McKay walked away without ever noticing him standing at the far end of the corridor, hidden in the shadows.

***

Rodney sighed as he dropped carefully onto his bed, half-glaring back at Carson's lopsided smirk but, once more, Carson seemed to know Rodney's body better than he did. The short walk from the infirmary had increased his headache and aggravated the muscle bruising from his fall. Carson reached into his pocket and withdrew a small bottle of pills. He shook out two, resealed the lid and placed the bottle on the bedside cabinet. As proof of how awful and tired he felt, Rodney did not even notice Carson fetching a glass of water from the bathroom until the glass was held out towards him. Rodney accepted both pills and the glass without a murmur, swallowing the pills quickly and setting the glass aside.

"Come on. Let's get you tucked up in bed. A wee nap will do you the world of good."

"I don't need a mother, Carson. I'm perfectly capable of getting myself undressed for bed."

Carson's grin widened and even Rodney had to admit that the bite was missing from his words and, if he wasn't so tired, he might even have cared. Instead, he grumbled some more as Carson ignored him and helped him strip down to his boxers, secretly appreciating the help to take off his t-shirt, before tucking him up in his bed. He must have drifted off the moment his head touched the pillow because he could not recall seeing Carson leave and yet the man was gone when he next opened his eyes.

Moving was an exercise in masochism, even worse than the morning following that night Cadman took his body for a spin around Atlantis without his permission; the pain killed his morning erection. The deep-seated ache in his bruised body and the thumping in his head made him wish he could lie in bed all day but his stomach had other ideas, rumbling loudly. He popped another couple of Tylenol and pushed off the bed, stripping off his boxers as he stumbled ungainly towards the shower. Setting it as hot as he could stand, Rodney let the heated spray massage his body, easing the aches and making him feel halfway human again. By the time he left the shower, he was a lot less stiff, though not even his fantasy of John Sheppard naked and wet in the shower with him was enough to bring a rise out of his body in that respect.

The mess hall was empty when he reached it, having missed the breakfast crowd, but there was plenty left to eat so Rodney took it as a good sign. He slumped into a seat in the corner table, not really surprised when Kusanagi asked to join him moments later. Rodney waved her to a seat, knowing he could always rely on Miko to tell him all the latest gossip from the labs during his absence, whether offworld or off-duty--not that he would ever admit to listening to gossip. Still, it was always good to hear Miko's kind descriptions of incidents while he secretly read between the lines and silently chortled at the mess some of his minions were getting into. At times like this, he almost missed Kavanagh because the man had a way of causing the most hilarious upsets--and people thought *he* was the socially retarded one!

"Colonel Sheppard spent many hours going through the security footage with Dr. Zelenka."

"Hours?"

"At least three hours. He seemed most upset that you were injured."

Rodney gave a noncommittal grunt because Sheppard had not made much of an effort to be seen with him recently, effectively ending their friendship even though he had promised he would let Rodney try to regain his trust. His single visit to the infirmary had been out of courtesy only because, despite Arcturus, Rodney was still the Chief Scientist on Atlantis. Sheppard had not even bothered to come by once Carson released him from the infirmary whereas, in the past, he would be the first on the scene. As for Sheppard's insinuation that it was not an accident, all civilian rank aside, Rodney had not expected him to make much of a deal out of some misfired prank especially as the culprits were most likely military. Certainly he had not expected more than a token gesture from Sheppard; a couple of enquiries and a little talk with the men. After all, Sheppard had done nothing about the other incidences that had plagued Rodney and his scientists since the new blood arrived on the _Daedalus_. Of course, all the scientists knew who was behind the pranks but, until recently, these were fairly harmless and his people had a way of getting back at the main culprits under the guise of failed environmental controls and the 'decrepitude' of a city lying unused at the bottom of an alien ocean for ten thousand years.

"Did he find anything?"

Miko shook her head quickly and sipped delicately at her tea.

The pranks had been minor irritations until recently but tripping him down the stairs was another matter entirely, although from the sound of it, there was no proof that it was anything other than a stupid accident despite Sheppard's suspicions. Rodney had been tired and distracted at the time, spending too many long hours in the lab now there was no one to drag him away from his work. Stupidly, he never thought he would miss those interruptions and the cajoling as Sheppard slammed shut his laptop, often only just missing Rodney's fingers, before dragging him away to some inane activity. He never thought he would be desperate to watch that damn football game again either, so long as Sheppard was sitting right there beside him, his warm thigh brushing against Rodney's, throwing popcorn at the screen as if he had not seen the game a dozen times over--or more.

"Are you going to eat that?" Rodney pointed at the piece of cake sitting untouched on Miko's plate.

"No, no, no," she waved her hands, her eyes shining when Rodney slid the plate over and took a huge bite before she could change her mind. As he stuffed the final piece in and licked at his fingers, Rodney frowned as he realized that he had never seen her eat coffee cake before, or drink coffee even, so the cake had probably been for him. He harrumphed and offered her a tight smile of thanks that brightened her whole face. Embarrassed, Rodney glanced around the mess hall, noticing the increased noise level as more people arrived for the mid-morning break. Several soldiers wandered in too, falling into line as they waited their turn to be served. Feeling a corresponding increase in his headache, Rodney rubbed his hands together.

"Back to work then."

Miko's face turned to horror. "No. You must rest. Doctor Beckett was most adamant that you must not go back to work today."

"Oh was he? Well, I'm sure what Carson doesn't know won't hurt him."

Rodney pushed up from the table and strode out of the mess hall with Miko chasing behind, his steps faltering as he passed by the familiar military table where Halston and two of his cronies must have dropped in after coming off duty.

"Look, it's the chief geek and his geisha. Been on any good trips recently?"

If his head had not been aching again, Rodney might have been tempted to stop but he knew from bitter experience that bullies like Halston needed actions rather than words to put them in their place so he carried on through the door. "Miko," he snapped when he noticed she had stopped beside the military table, only continuing on when he could hear her quick footsteps following on behind him.

***

Two days later, McKay was back to terrorizing scientists and soldiers alike with all thoughts of being targeted by some disgruntled marine seemingly forgotten. Except John had not forgotten, and neither had someone else judging by the lines of pain etched into Halston's forehead.

"It's a bad break," Beckett murmured softly to John, just out of earshot of the injured soldier. "It's not something that can be fixed in a jiffy even with all this Ancient technology lying around the infirmary."

"Recommendation?"

"The _Daedalus_ is due in a few weeks. Halston should be sent home on it for rehab back on Earth."

John licked his lips. Lorne had already drawn up the paperwork that would send Halston back on the _Daedalus_ and he had it ready to transmit to the SGC in the next data burst. Approval or denial would have come in next week's data burst but that was moot point now as Beckett would be drawing up a different set of orders that needed no approval, for his medical jurisdiction overruled any military request. In some ways it was a relief to know Atlantis would be seeing the back of Halston but John's sixth sense was tingling. Halston had fallen down a flight of stairs. Once more, an investigation had found nothing untoward at the scene but the security cameras had suffered a unique malfunction just around the time of the fall, and the coincidence had left a bitter taste in John's mouth following the incident onboard the _Daedalus_ all those months earlier, when the Wraith virus had taken over the ship. If this was no accident then either it was revenge for McKay's tumble a few days earlier, or the original prankster had not been Halston or one of his associates after all. Either way, John had a problem to deal with.

He spent the next week on tenterhooks, waiting to see if there was any retaliation against the scientists but everything slipped back into what passed for normality with both the Halston and McKay incidents shrugged off as unfortunate accidents. Elizabeth sent a memo to all personnel reminding them to take greater care while walking around the city in the belief that both of these accidents could have been avoided by a little vigilance. John did not believe it though, and he knew it was only a matter of time before another so-called accident occurred.

The next incident came sooner than John imagined.

***

Rodney relaxed against the shower wall, letting the water and the images of John flow over him as he slowly thrust into his own lathered hand. Images from offworld missions, from sharing facilities in backward villages, added fuel to the fire coiling in his belly. He visualized the lean, muscular body with tiny rivulets of water furrowing the dark hairs that covered his chest and torso. He ran a hand down his own body, imagining the feel of John's firm flesh, of the ripple of muscle beneath his fingertips as they grazed over a washboard stomach, trailing along an ever-thickening line of curly dark hairs leading to the shock of pubic hair and the glorious erection standing proud. Rodney closed his eyes as he imagined slipping to his knees, cheek nuzzling the curved length of John's cock before he tilted his face enough to mouth and kiss the silken flesh. He took the head into his mouth, licking and sucking on the hard column, tongue flicking over the sensitive tip. He could almost taste John, could almost taste a salty droplet of precome exploding across his tongue like the sweetest nectar.

He could see John standing before him, head thrown back in pleasure and dark eyelashes spiked with splashes of water from the shower. His mouth was a soft 'O', his large, eager fingers buried in Rodney's damp hair, holding him still as John fucked his mouth, hearing him cry out his pleasure as hot, bittersweet juices spurted into Rodney's mouth.

Rodney's breath caught in his throat as the powerful image overwhelmed him. He gave a subtle twist of his wrist and the flick of his thumb over the sensitive bundle of nerves, feeling the warm sensation unfold from deep inside as his cock pulsed in his hand, splattering his belly and fingers with his own come momentarily before the water rinsed him clean. He panted softly, tipping back his head to let the warm water flow over his face to cascade down his body as the last quivers of pleasure sang along his spine. Taking one last deep breath, he immersed his face completely and then shut off the water. His skin was tingling all over, nerve endings singing as he briskly rubbed down his wet body.

***

"Because it itches, Carson. See?"

John entered the infirmary to find his resident genius but estranged friend seated on one of Beckett's beds, scratching at the rash that covered all the visible parts of his body. Beckett slapped the hand away and offered a small tub of medication.

"What happened?"

"Contact Urticaria. Rodney should know better than to borrow over people's shower gels without checking the list of possible allergens first."

"Except I didn't," McKay exclaimed in annoyance.

"So where did you get the gel, McKay?" John asked through gritted teeth, unable to keep the irritation out of his voice.

"In my shower," he replied sarcastically, giving them a withering look as if he thought they were both idiots. "Look...I got up, I took a shower. Twenty minutes later I'm covered in a rash, which Carson is going to treat before I go insane from the itching. Obviously, I've developed a new allergy to whatever the SGC are putting in the shower gel these days. Probably some fungicide or other antibiotic supposedly to kill alien spores..." McKay started to scratch again and Beckett grabbed his hand, holding on just a little too long for John's liking though it did, at least, put an end to the impending rant. John frowned down at the joined hands, only looking back up once Beckett had released McKay's hand to find McKay staring at him with an almost blank expression that did not quite hide the anguish in his eyes. Before John could question it, McKay looked away, his mouth a grim line.

"And you haven't...borrowed anyone else's--"

"No."

McKay was pretty adamant about this so John took this as his cue to leave him in the infirmary and go investigate what was niggling at the back of his mind. Atlantis let him into McKay's quarters without a murmur of disapproval and John went straight to the shower stall. He reached in and grabbed what McKay believed to be the offending shower gel and looked at it closely by holding it up to the light. The contents had started to separate into two distinct viscous liquids. Both were similar in coloring but John could see the difference between them. He licked his lips as he considered his next course of action, nodding to himself in the bathroom mirror as he came to a decision. As he left McKay's quarters, he thought he saw someone disappearing quickly around the far corner at the end of the corridor but knew there was no sense in trying to catch up as they would be long gone by the time he reached the junction.

Ten minutes later, one of the chemists was drawing off samples of both liquids. John waited with as much patience as he could muster as the chemical composition was analyzed using one of the Ancient machines left behind in the city. The results came up quickly and the chemist hummed in satisfaction as he interpreted the findings.

"Well, the heavier liquid is ordinary fragrance-free shower gel. However, the lighter liquid has a different chemical make-up. If you take a sniff of the more concentrated extract from the bottle, you can pick up the scent. It's subtle but it's there. Nasty stuff in a greater concentration. Could strip the skin off a man."

"So what was this doing in McKay's shower?"

"McKay? Someone tampered with McKay's shower gel?"

"Obviously not enough to cause more than an annoying skin rash."

"Colonel, these pranks have got to stop. Only last week, Mitters found itching powder in his socks and before that Sarkovski had a bruised shoulder after a cabinet door slammed back because someone had messed with the spring-loaded hinges."

"Mitters and Sarkovski?" John recognized the names. "Anyone else?"

"Yeah, plenty. This has been going on for months. Someone even mingled leaves from the mainland in with Kusanagi's tea and made her sick for a couple of days. Beckett thought she'd been trying some of the Athosian teas and she was too meek to argue with him."

John recalled mention of Miko's illness from the daily briefing some weeks back but never thought more of it at the time. Now he could see a pattern emerging that fitted with Lorne's suspicions regarding Halston, except Halston was in the infirmary with a broken leg so he could not be responsible for this latest nasty prank on McKay.

"Can you write me up a report about this...stuff," he asked, indicating towards the shower gel. The chemist agreed and John nodded his thanks before leaving.

As he walked back towards his office, John thought about Halston and the small group of marines--mostly fresh off the _Daedalus_ \--that seemed to always be at Halston's beck and call. In particular, Ericsson and Saunders hovered around him, sharing meals with Halston and joining him on work-outs. They would commandeer a corner of the mess hall at every meal break, along with several other marines. Sometimes they were a little loud and raucous, mildly intimidating the junior scientists who passed by but John wondered if they were only keeping it down whenever he was in the vicinity. He knew Lorne had sat with the group once or twice in the beginning, after the incident on 'radiation death world', but not much since, preferring to spend the time with his own gate team instead, just as John used to do before Arcturus.

His thoughts splintered at memories of times before Arcturus.

Technically, John did still sit with most of his team though, recently, he found an excuse to be elsewhere if McKay turned up and joined them. He knew it was petty and he had seen the hurt in McKay's eyes, quickly covered, but that had not stopped McKay from trying again and again, making John feel a little guilty because he had promised to give him a chance to 'earn back his trust'. Mostly, though, McKay sat with Zelenka and Beckett and occasionally with other scientists. John had nothing against Zelenka and, before Arcturus, he would even join him and McKay, listening in on all the technobabble with half his attention while the other half roamed around the mess hall checking out the new faces, especially after visits from the _Daedalus_. He got to know the faces of the new marines quick enough as they had to report to him but not the scientists because they reported directly to McKay and Beckett. Of course, the hard part was trying to not make it look too obvious, otherwise he ended up with either an annoyed McKay or the unwanted attentions of some new scientist who thought he was making a play for them--and sometimes both.

Before the incident with Cadman and the body sharing, John had kind of liked Beckett too but seeing McKay kiss Beckett, even if it was Cadman in control, had opened up a whole load of issues that John would prefer to keep closed. He knew he liked men as well as women but flying fast planes and helicopters had been his childhood dream, one that he refused to let go of as he moved into adulthood. He had always figured women would be enough for him and losing out on the pleasure of having another man in his bed was a small price to pay to fulfill his dream. Now, he was beginning to understand that the price had only seemed small while there was no one of consequence to dream about. In those days, he had never met Rodney McKay. He had never shared in the childlike joy of discovery or watched a self-confessed coward walk into an energy-sucking darkness.

McKay surprised him often, revealing another facet of a complex person just when John believed he knew everything he needed to know about the man.

Intellectually, McKay was a perfect match with his quicksilver mind and sharp tongue. Physically, McKay should not have been his type at all. Not with his soft belly and with skin that rarely saw the sunlight unless dragged out on missions, but then John recalled the broad shoulders and surprisingly muscular arms and thighs, glimpsed while washing while off-world and, most recently in the infirmary. Enforced work-outs with the team, and with Teyla in particular, had turned most of that geek fat to muscle, sculpturing his body but leaving just enough softness behind to remind John of McKay's vulnerability in the field.

He snorted in annoyance at how easily his thoughts strayed to McKay, forcing his mind back on the problem at hand.

Switching on his laptop, John settled behind his desk and began checking through Beckett's daily reports. He tightened his lips as a pattern emerged of minor incidences and accidents that could not be explained satisfactorily. Looking through the reports, the incidences had started following the influx of military and scientists fresh off the _Daedalus_ on its second run. Saunders had arrived with Everett but Halston and Ericsson had been onboard the _Daedalus_ during the Wraith virus incident. They had to have known what McKay had done to save the whole damned ship and everyone on it, and how he had nearly been killed on at least three separate occasions while he and Hermiod flushed the virus out of the _Daedalus_ 's systems. If either of those men were behind this spate of suspicious incidences then there was something definitely wrong with them. Admittedly, McKay did manage to annoy most everyone he met but even if they had no liking for the man, they had to respect his abilities.

His mailbox pinged and John checked the new message, finding the report detailing the chemical substance used to harm McKay. A report from Beckett on McKay's condition arrived soon after and John could see that, once again, this was a prank gone a little too far. The concentration of the irritant would have been just a minor annoyance to ninety-five percent of the people on Atlantis but McKay, with his fair skin and allergies, had fallen into the remaining five percent. Still, McKay's unusual reaction was not cause for letting this incident slide with just a general warning broadcast across the city. John needed to catch the culprit before he or she started an all-out war between the soldiers and scientists.

***

Damn but it itched like crazy and Rodney was certain he'd be insane long before Carson's medication took any effect. At least Carson had not embarrassed Rodney by letting Sheppard know that it was, quite literally all over. In particular, his dick itched so much that he'd even consider castration just to be free of the sensory overload that had stepped across the boundary between pleasure and pain. Almost as bad was the rash under his arms and on his nipples, and he couldn't reach the middle of his back to alleviate the terrible itching there either.

With a ragged sigh of misery, Rodney clicked on his radio and called for Carson--again.

***

Another two days passed with no progress and John was beginning to think he ought to install security cameras at every junction on Atlantis, or at least figure out how to get those systems online now that Atlantis had a ZPM. Instead, he watched as Beckett bandaged up Ericsson's hands, knowing the chemical burns would ease in time but, for now, the injury had earned Ericsson a one way ticket back to the Milky Way. John looked across as the infirmary door opened and was surprised to see McKay bluster his way in. He narrowed his eyes as McKay showed no interest in Ericsson's injuries, barely acknowledging the marine except with a twitch of his crooked mouth, as if he had expected to see him seated there with his hands completely bandaged from fingers to elbows.

"Rodney! What can I do for you?" Beckett finished with Ericsson and wandered across the infirmary.

"Carson, I need more of this cream and..." he rolled his wrist several times in lieu of words, head giving a slight flick backward.

"You need my help... again? I thought Dr. Kusanagi had offered?"

McKay mumbled something that even John could not make out with his sharper hearing but, whatever it was, it made Beckett snigger and offer McKay a teasing grin that had Rodney flushing pink with embarrassment. Once more, John felt his blood pressure rise when Beckett reached out and laid a hand on Rodney's bare arm, drawing Rodney's eyes to Beckett's for several seconds too long as far as John was concerned. Without being consciously aware, John drifted closer to the two doctors, overhearing more of their conversation.

"Is it all right if I drop by later tonight then? Around eight?"

Rodney murmured something back; his face still flushed high on his cheeks, long lashes fluttering sinfully, almost coyly as if flirting with Beckett. In response, Beckett smirked and patted Rodney's arm once more before adding quietly, "Make sure you're undressed and ready for me when I get there...and can we do it on the bed tonight as it fair killed my back bending over that chair?"

Images of Beckett's hands framing Rodney's face filled John's mind. He visualized Beckett drawing Rodney in to lavish gentle kisses that built in intensity, hands roaming beneath the blue shirt to tease an already erect nipple, swallowing Rodney's soft moans and tiny whines of need. Hands would creep south, cupping the hard cock straining against the front of Rodney's pants, circling with just the right amount of pressure to tease mercilessly. Their moans would get louder only their heavy panting betraying their lust as they locked the door behind them before Beckett slowly stripped the clothes from Rodney's body, the gentle doctor's hands knowing exactly where to touch and caress to elicit moans of pleasure as he slipped a well-practiced finger deep into Rodney's generous but perfect ass.

He groaned softly as the image of Rodney kissing Beckett filled his head, fueled by the reality forced upon Rodney by Cadman. He imagined the supple fingers carding through Beckett's short, spiky hair while that flexible tongue delved and licked as they kissed, wet and open-mouthed like randy teenagers. His legs would wrap around Beckett's waist, the little needy sounds and babbling increasing as Beckett pushed inside or, judging from Beckett's comments, maybe Rodney would be the one stretching and filling Beckett.

John swallowed hard, feeling the sudden tightness in his chest and the heat in his groin as his body reacted to the illusion. The mere thought of seeing the reality had John stalking from the infirmary, and not because he had any problems with two men engaged in heavy petting. It was the thought of watching Beckett get to home base with Rodney that was the deciding factor and John knew he needed to work off a little steam before he turned around and punched Beckett for stealing...

"Wait just a goddamn moment," he hissed to himself. Beckett could only be stealing if Rodney had been John's in the first place and that was clearly not the case. Then another thought struck him at how he was compartmentalizing Rodney in his mind. All the anger was directed at McKay, using his surname even mentally to distance himself from the hurt and the pain of both their actions but whenever he thought of the other man in a needful way, it was always 'Rodney'. Then it occurred to him that, before Cadman used Rodney to kiss Beckett, John had called him 'Carson' and had considered him a friend too.

He stepped out onto the closest balcony and commanded the door to close and lock behind him. It was not often that he was slapped that hard by a revelation and it shocked him because he had never considered himself to be the jealous type before. Except he was jealous, though thankfully, not insanely jealous even if this was Beckett...no, *Carson* stealing Rodney away from him. Yet he had no right to be jealous because he was the one who had pulled away from Rodney. He was the one who had made glib remarks about re-earning trust and then refused to allow Rodney the opportunity to put things right between them by avoiding him even when he was hurt and in pain. At least Carson had been there for Rodney, tending to his injuries and consoling him in his mental anguish following Arcturus.

John clenched the balcony railing and stared hard out over the churning blue ocean. Following the Arcturus incident, Rodney had needed to repair a number of broken bridges and, in that first week before Zelenka forgave him, only Carson, Miko and Teyla would share a meal with him. If none of them was around then he sat alone in the mess hall eating his meal with grim determination and an obstinate refusal to allow the estrangement to force him to run away and hide.

Of course, John had no such problems as he played the injured party, almost taking pleasure in seeing Rodney cut off and alone, believing he deserved a little fallout from the disaster that had nearly killed them both. Some part of him had wanted to see that arrogance ripped away but all John could see now was his own pettiness in leaving Rodney vulnerable and alone as the vultures circled around him, with only Carson and Teyla fending them off in those first few days. Hell, he had even glibly told Rodney he no longer trusted him when they went in after the crew of the Aurora and, even if no one else noticed, John had seen the stab of pain flicker in Rodney's too expressive eyes.

If Rodney had found a small measure of happiness with Carson then who was he to argue and act like the jealous boyfriend? It's not like he'd been much of any kind of friend lately and it was not like he had been there when Rodney had needed him over these past weeks. His attitude towards Rodney had been the example for all his men to follow. His disrespect and snide comments had left Rodney an open target for the likes of Halston and the others, and that had to change immediately because, like it or not, he did give more than just a damn about Rodney.

Taking another deep and calming breath, John pushed away from the balcony. Zelenka had pulled another set of security footage from the area surrounding the latest incident with Ericsson in the hope that the perpetrator had not considered tampering with those. He walked back into the city, determined to put an end to this series of nasty pranks before he lost more men or, worse still, before he lost Rodney.

With some trepidation, John called up the footage of the main science laboratory from several hours before the incident with Ericsson. Rodney was a self-confessed genius so it was not beyond the realms of possibility that he might have doctored the laboratory footage to show his continued presence, perhaps looping the feed so he could slip away and set up the 'accident'. If that was the case then perhaps John would spot the fake cuts.

He felt his stomach flip as he caught sight of Rodney moving around the laboratory, animatedly debating ideas before settling down in front of his own laptop. He had missed seeing him at work, seeing all that amazing energy firing up those around him. Other scientists interrupted him constantly and it made John appreciate how patient Rodney was in reality, for John knew he would be tearing his hair out if his own work was disrupted that often. Rodney's expressive face revealed how he felt about each interruption. There was always an initial irritation that quickly slipped away as the innate curiosity that made him such a good scientist took over. After that, it depended on the scientist presenting his or her work. Some strode off in anger as Rodney ripped their work to shreds, some left looking crestfallen but far more left with either a bounce in their step or a purposeful stride, enlightenment or excitement suffusing their faces.

John recalled a conversation he had once overheard between a group of scientists discussing Rodney.

"He's a goddamn ogre. He ripped my theory on Puddlejumper aerodynamics to pieces--"

"Your theory was crap and you know it."

"Doesn't matter--"

"What? He's supposed to pat you on the back and tell you nice try?"

"Personally, I prefer it when he rips into someone over shoddy work. It makes the praise all the sweeter."

John smiled, recalling the reluctant nods of agreement, even from the Puddlejumper theorist. His smile faded as his thoughts returned to the task at hand.

If Rodney was responsible for the retaliations then rebuilding trust between them would have to go both ways as it was obvious that Rodney had not trusted him enough to come to him with his grievances or trust him to deal with the pranksters. Perhaps he thought John was encouraging them or consenting to the bullying by his inaction. He took a shaky breath, only now realizing how it felt to lose a friend's trust and knowing Rodney had lived with this feeling for weeks now.

Of course, that also left the problem of what to do if he discovered that it was Rodney behind Halston's fall and Ericsson's burns. Atlantis needed Rodney far more than it needed Halston and Ericsson, in fact, far more than it needed anyone else on the expedition but the SGC would not see it that way. Everyone knew the adage that there was a thin line between genius and insanity, and the SGC might consider that Rodney had crossed that line and demand he return to Earth. Certainly, elements of the SGC and other international committees had no love for the irascible scientist. Few people could claim to be Rodney's intellectual equal, and most hated the fact that he was so much smarter than them--and that he knew it.

It left John with only one option. He had failed to protect Rodney from himself on Doranda but he could protect him now. He had to find out if Rodney was responsible for the incidences and then erase any lingering evidence if that was the case.

***

Saunders stood between the two infirmary beds holding his best men. The _Daedalus_ was due to arrive any time now and he knew that both men would be leaving Atlantis when it returned to Earth. In both cases, they had fallen foul of retaliation by the scientists but, until a few moments earlier, Saunders had no idea which of the damn geeks was responsible. McKay's half smirk when he saw Ericsson's bandaged hands had left no doubt in his mind that McKay was the one to blame for their current condition. In each case, the retaliation had been short and brutal, intended to cause sufficient harm to give them a one way ticket out of the Pegasus galaxy but without maiming them permanently. It was the sort of underhanded gesture that he ought to have expected from a coward like McKay and it made Saunders wonder what nasty prank McKay had in store for him.

As far as he could see, the only way around this was to get McKay first, and to get him good and proper, making sure he was on the next ship home to the Milky Way with no chance of returning. It would serve the cold-hearted bastard right to have a taste of his own medicine. All he had to do was figure out a way to get the chief scientist alone, aware that no one else would give a damn what happened to him. Certainly not Colonel Sheppard, who had made his disdain for McKay pretty obvious since the scientist almost got him killed through his arrogance and negligence. Hell, the man had got one of his own people cooked and that had still not stopped him from nearly killing the Colonel too. It was little wonder that few people had anything decent to say about McKay. All Saunders ever heard was moans and disgruntled words from scientists and soldier alike as they suffered caustic comments and verbal abuse from McKay. He spared no one the lash of his sharp tongue, not even that pathetic Japanese doctor who hung on his every word like a panting dog.

No, as far as Saunders was concerned, he would be doing them all a favor by getting rid of McKay.

***

After two hours John had to admit that either Rodney was an exceptionally talented video editor, or he really was accounted for during those hours before Ericsson returned to his quarters and had acid rather than water flow out of his wash basin taps. The coincidence was not lost on John. Rodney had fallen down some stairs and then so did Halston, though far worse. Rodney had suffered a nasty, itchy rash from a chemical irritant in his bathroom and now Ericsson had suffered chemical burns from his wash basin.

Without a means of washing off the acid quickly, Ericsson had raced to the infirmary where Carson had quickly applied a solution to neutralize the acid, though not quickly enough to prevent the burns that had damaged Ericsson's hands. According to Carson, they would heal in time but it would take months of skin grafts and physical therapy before he had full dexterity once more, and that was best accomplished on Earth.

Whether intentional or not, the two most likely candidates for causing Rodney's accidents had been removed from the city permanently as John could not imagine them ever being reassigned to Atlantis, not even once their injuries had healed. At least, not if he had a say in it. But John had to be certain that no blame would ever fall back on Rodney before he could rest easy once again.

***

"Major!"

Lorne turned around, his brow furrowing in unease as McKay strode towards him with that determined look on his face that always meant trouble. "McKay?"

"I need one of your men to accompany me to Grounding Station Three."

"That area was damaged during the wraith attack."

"Yes...although, technically, it was damaged worse during the storm when Kolya's men opened fire on it. This is why I need one of your men."

"You're expecting an attack?"

"No, I'm expecting nothing but a broken grounding station but, as you so carefully pointed out, that area was further damaged during the Wraith siege, bringing down sensors and communications in that part of the city."

Enlightenment struck. "And... you're following Colonel Sheppard's directive not to enter damaged sectors of the city without an escort." Which meant McKay must have cleared this with Weir also as he had been especially careful to follow protocol since Arcturus. Lorne knew it couldn't last indefinitely but... his thoughts were interrupted.

"See! I knew there was a brain in there somewhere."

Lorne gave a wry smile, knowing that could almost be taken as a compliment coming from McKay.

"When do you want to head out?"

McKay shrugged lazily, studying his nails while the corner of his mouth drooped into a sour line. "Oh, anytime in the next century will do."

Lorne narrowed his eyes in irritation at the obvious sarcasm and clicked his headset radio twice. "Eichmann. Report to Doctor McKay in Sector 3 in..." he eyed McKay who simply raised a tool kit and his eyebrows to indicate that he was already prepared to go. "...ten minutes. You're on escort duty. Half hour check-ins."

Lorne heard Corporal Eichmann's affirmative, noting the blandness of his response that indicated that he was less than happy with the duty. If he was not already committed to other duties, Lorne might have offered to go with McKay instead. Over the past few months he had come to see beyond the egotistical, loud-mouthed scientist to the caring and dedicated person beneath the sarcasm and arrogance. He had walked into an Iratus bug nest with the terrified scientist, knowing the man had no place there except out of loyalty towards his friends. He had read the report from the Aurora where McKay had followed Sheppard into the virtual environment when Sheppard had shown signs of being in danger, knowing he might get trapped in there as well. Lorne knew from older reports that the man had shown tremendous bravery more times than most would care to recount because that courage was often hidden behind arrogance and ego. Yet Lorne knew it took a brave man to step into the line of fire especially when he could visualize, in glorious Technicolor, the consequences should it all go to hell, which it frequently did. McKay might be a pain in the ass but he was loyal and dedicated, and Lorne felt it was about time Sheppard remembered that.

Since the disaster of the Arcturus project, Sheppard had made it pretty clear that he wanted nothing more to do with McKay but Lorne could not see the problem. Okay, so the project had failed on a massive scale, taking out most of an uninhabited solar system but, from what Lorne had gleaned from the reports, no one had voiced any objections until it was almost too late anyway. At the very least, the risk was nothing compared to the potential benefit to Earth and the Pegasus galaxy had the weapon worked and even Caldwell had argued for a continuation of the test firing. Every soldier knew that there was no such thing as a perfect mission, and that mistakes happened. Things went wrong under even the best of circumstances and you just had to think quickly to save the day and try to get out of there alive, just as Sheppard had on Doranda that day. So why Sheppard had taken it all so personally was beyond him.

McKay made some noncommittal noise as Lorne signed off, which Lorne had learned to translate as 'thanks'. He watched the scientist stride purposefully back down the corridor before making another report, this time to his commanding officer. At the very least, it might ingratiate McKay with Sheppard a little just from the Colonel learning that he was attempting to follow security protocols.

"Major?"

"McKay asked for an escort to Grounding Station Three. I've assigned Corporal Eichmann."

"Isn't that the one damaged by the Genii?"

"Yes, sir."

"Hmm. Figured McKay would have had that fixed by now."

"I believe it took on more damage during the Wraith attack."

"Yeah. Okay. Keep me posted and let me know when he gets back."

"Yes, Sir."

Lorne signed off, frowning a little at the audible change in Sheppard's attitude towards McKay whereas before Sheppard had bristled whenever McKay's name was even casually mentioned. Perhaps Sheppard was finally coming around after all. With a soft huff, thinking it was about time, Lorne turned back to his own duties once more.

***

John pulled up the security feed for the corridors surrounding the laboratories, playing three of them side-by-side. He wasn't certain exactly what had caught his eye but he found himself pausing the playback and rewinding all three by several minutes. His hand darted out to pause the playback the moment the anomaly made itself known, his sharp eyes having caught something--or rather someone--who could not be in two places at one time. With open-mouthed disbelief, he watched as a second Miko Kusanagi slipped around the corner of a corridor. She was only seen for a split second but John's 'fighter pilot' eyes were used to working at that level of detail.

In hindsight it all made sense because, of all people, she was Rodney's staunchest supporter, almost worshipping the ground he walked upon. Where most of the scientists sided with Zelenka over the Arcturus debacle, Miko had stayed loyal to Rodney; sitting with him at meal times to keep him company and reminding others of all the good Rodney had done to save them.

She was one of the few scientists that Rodney tolerated on a day-to-day basis, hard working and conscientious, and providing the support Rodney needed in the daily management of the ever-increasing science department. Zelenka relied on her too, finding her assistance and natural ability with the ATA gene essential when John refused to play guinea pig for him.

If only for personal reasons, John hated the idea of exposing Miko as one of the main contributors to both Halston and Ericsson's injuries. Certainly he did not want her having to face charges back on Earth. She was one of the original expedition members, fighting right alongside them during the siege even though Rodney had ordered her to the alpha site during the main battle. John gave a wry smile. Where Kavanagh and others had needed no second request to flee through the Stargate, Miko had simply stayed behind, keeping so quiet that no one realized she was still traipsing around after Rodney and Zelenka, bringing them meals and coffee, until long after the dust had settled from the nuclear explosion detonated over the city to fool the Wraith.

Knowing he had at least an hour and maybe more before Rodney returned from Grounding Station Three, John decided he would use this time to speak with Dr. Kusanagi alone. Hopefully, he would be able to convince her to stop the retaliations once she knew that John would be watching out for Rodney... *and* the other scientists.

***

Eichmann swore under his breath as Lorne handed out the assignment. He had expected a slow shift on gate duty, just hanging around watching the scientists go to and fro doing whatever scientists do. Perhaps McKay or Zelenka would show up as that always guaranteed a few sparks. He smothered a grin as he recalled the way McKay had simply grabbed the occupied seat by the DHD one day and sent it spinning away while he went straight to work on the control panel. The look on that Canadian tech Sergeant's face was priceless. Still, watching these things from a distance was far different than spending time up-close and personal with the man. The fact that Major Lorne had asked for half hour check-ins meant that he anticipated at least two or three--minimum. That was at least an hour and probably more in the doctor's company. Even the Major had been exasperated after spending a couple of hours with McKay back on that radiation world, actually quipping that he was grateful Ford stunned him when he did.

Eichmann finished clipping his P90 to his vest and turned to leave, finding the doorway barred by Sergeant Saunders.

"Sir?"

"Head to the gate room in an hour as originally rostered. I'll escort McKay."

Eichmann felt his eyebrows crawl up to his hairline in surprise because no one ever volunteered for babysitting duty, and especially not when the baby was McKay but he wasn't going to argue. If Saunders wanted the duty then he could have it.

"Yes, sir."

Eichmann strode off with a lighter step and headed towards the control room.

***

Rodney tapped his stylus against his tablet PC impatiently as he waited for his escort to arrive. When the transporter door opened, Rodney started to berate the marine but snapped his mouth closed when Sgt. Saunders stepped out. Of all the soldiers Lorne could have picked to escort him, it had to be the one who had taken a personal and obvious dislike to him from the very start.

Rodney recalled Saunders from the soldier's first day on Atlantis and how he had swaggered into the city behind Everett and treated him and the rest of the scientists like they were vermin infesting Atlantis. He had used the word 'civilian' with disdain, ordering them about in a condescending manner and using bullying tactics against anyone who objected.

At the time, Rodney was riding high on stims and virtually no sleep so he had not paid a huge amount of attention to the sergeant, or anyone else come to think of it. He and Radek had a job to do once Everett screwed up and left them without any means of defense beyond the rail guns being set up on the balconies. Of course, Rodney had made his opinion known right away, making sure Everett knew what he thought of his gung-ho tactics and, if looks could kill then Saunders would have had no need for the 9mm strapped to his thigh.

Since then, Saunders had made the lives of some of Rodney's minions a misery. Trips in hallways and juvenile pranks seemed to be his calling card as he encouraged his cronies to follow in his footsteps. Still, he had never tried anything on with Rodney until recently, no doubt wanting to fly below Sheppard's radar. Except Sheppard's radar had gone offline after Arcturus.

When he awoke in the infirmary after his fall, Rodney should have given into his paranoia that it was no accident, especially as that was not the first suspicious action around him. Two days before the fall, he had found a piece of plastic embedded in his mashed potato after being jostled by Ericsson on his way to his lunch table and, before that, someone had laced his favorite coffee pot with a mild laxative. Strangely enough, Halston had been on patrol close to the labs that day.

Rodney already knew about Miko's tea leaves, the itching powder and a dozen other minor irritations over the months since the siege but, as all of those incidences could be explained away easily enough and with no evidence to support otherwise, he had no recourse but to ignore them and hope the pranksters slipped up eventually. He had planned to have a friendly word with Sheppard about his men when they set out for Doranda but then Arcturus had happened, and Sheppard had made it clear since then that Rodney no longer had anything of importance to say to him. Instead, Rodney knew he had to wait until he had some hard evidence against Saunders and his bullies before he approached Sheppard on a professional level.

It occurred to Rodney that perhaps this current escort assignment was fortuitous. There had never been the opportunity to talk with Saunders alone and come to some sort of understanding. Maybe this was the chance he needed before someone was fatally injured by the escalating nastiness of the pranks.

"So. Just you and me then. We'd best get started."

"Sure, Doctor McKay. Lead the way." Saunders gave a predatory smile.

"Hmm." Rodney looked back at the transporter, wondering if he ought to simply abandon this task until another day when he would have more congenial company. He took a half-step back towards it but Saunders shuffled sideways, blocking his path.

"Grounding Station Three is that way." Saunders indicated with his P90 along one long corridor heading to the north of the city.

"Yes. Of course." Hefting his tool kit, Rodney turned and started to walk, conscious of the footsteps echoing right behind him. At this slow pace it could take half an hour to reach the damaged station and Lorne had insisted on half hour check-ins. He might even be monitoring their progress for part of the journey as the sensors were working closer to the center of the city, suffering damage only on the outer northern reaches. Mentally, Rodney shook himself, almost ashamed of his paranoia. Saunders was duty-bound to protect him after all, having been ordered to by Major Lorne so, really, the worse he could suffer was a little additional intimidation.

The silence thickened, heavy with Rodney's fear and Saunders's malice, and this made Rodney nervous. When he was nervous, Rodney had a habit of talking too much and too fast to fill the void but even he stuttered to a verbal halt when it became very clear that Saunders was not going to utter a single word to him. Paranoia reigned in his head once more as the deathly silence filled his imagination with ideas of walking to his execution. Twenty minutes later, tense and afraid, Rodney stopped and fumbled with the toolkit, dropping it to the ground.

"I just need to check in with Zelenka and--" He reached for his headset but gasped when Saunders ripped it from him and threw it aside as he shoved Rodney forward, the toolkit forgotten as Rodney stumbled a couple of steps before regaining his balance. He turned in fear-induced outrage.

"Hey! What do you think..?"

The muzzle of the P90 shoved under his chin made him lose the rest of his words and he raised his hands in a defenseless gesture.

"Grounding Station Three is still that way, Doctor." Saunders grabbed his shoulder and spun him back in the direction they had been walking, the P90 digging into Rodney's back to provide the necessary incentive to keep moving.

***

"It has to stop now," John stated to the quietly sobbing Miko. "I know you thought you were protecting McKay because no one else seemed to be looking out for him but that's not the case anymore." He reached out and awkwardly patted her shoulder. "I'm looking out for him now."

Miko stared at him for a moment and must have read the truth in his eyes because her eyes widened a fraction before she nodded. "I will do as you ask."

"Promise." John wasn't so sure it could really be this simple but Miko nodded again, more forcefully.

"Yes."

Sighing with relief, John left the otherwise empty laboratory and headed towards the mess hall. He needed a beer after this but as that was not going to happen, he decided to make do with a coffee instead. He saw Lorne coming towards him from the opposite direction and decided he could use the company. Lorne seemed to take the non-verbal hint and fell in step beside him.

"Problem?"

"Not any more...I hope. Least, not from that quarter." John gave him a sideways glance. "Any word back from McKay?"

"Should be checking-in in another ten minutes."

The doors to the mess hall opened as they approached and John took a slight side step to avoid the marine exiting, offering a half-smile as the marine straightened and stood aside. John carried on pass and then noticed that Lorne was no longer right behind him. He turned just as Lorne called out to the marine.

"Corporal Eichmann? McKay back already?" Lorne frowned in confusion and John could understand the annoyance as Eichmann should have reported in once circumstances changed.

Eichmann blanched slightly. "Sergeant Saunders relieved me of escort duty, Sir."

"Saunders!" John looked quickly to Lorne, both of them aware that Saunders was part of the Halston and Ericsson group that had been geek-baiting. He licked his lips thoughtfully, wondering why Saunders would offer to baby-sit McKay, and all he could think of was that Saunders intended to use the time to intimidate McKay as payback for Halston and Ericsson.

"Sir?"

"Carry on, Eichmann. I'll handle this." He waited until Eichmann had moved out of earshot and then turned to Lorne. "I'm going to take a brisk walk out to Grounding Station Three."

"A brisk walk sounds good to me too, sir."

John eyed him curiously for a moment and then shrugged. Knowing McKay, he was probably giving back as good as he was getting from Saunders but John didn't want to take the chance should Rodney push Saunders too far and end up getting punched. The last thing Atlantis needed was an arrogant astrophysicist with a bloody nose and in a real snit.

"Sector 3 in five. Full gear."

By brisk walk, John meant a steady jog but Lorne made no complaint as they moved through the damaged sector of the city towards the grounding station that Kolya's men had severely damaged while trying to kill John. Rodney had done makeshift repairs to get the station back online but most of that was negated when one of the downed Wraith darts struck this portion of the city. With so much else to do, the repair task had been given to Kavanagh but he had never managed to bend the station to his will the way Rodney could. Weeks would pass with no problems and then higher seas would batter at the area and take it offline once more. Kavanagh was back on Earth now having decided he'd had his share of life and death in the Pegasus galaxy and Rodney's time was too precious to spend on basic maintenance--until now.

He slowed, a frown creasing his forehead when he saw Rodney's toolkit standing in the center of the corridor, wondering why he had left it here.

"Colonel!"

John glanced over, eyes widening in concern when he saw the headset dangling from Lorne's fingers, seeing the same worry on Lorne's face. John glanced along the corridor, mentally calculating the distance left to cover. He opened a military channel, not wanting to worry Elizabeth if it turned out that Rodney had merely thrown a tantrum and discarded his gear.

"I want two teams to Grounding Station three. Double time...and get a jumper in the air. Sheppard out."

Without another word, John started to run, the sound of Lorne's pounding feet keeping him company as they both raced towards the damaged grounding station.

***

"You know... this really isn't necessary. I'm sorry about Halpter and Rickman but I had nothing--"

"Halston and Ericsson. God, you don't even give a shit about their names, do you? What were they? Just Wraith fodder to you? Like Gearing and Jacobski?"

Rodney glanced back over his shoulder in confusion. "Who?" He cried out in pain as Saunders shoved the P90 hard into his back again.

"The two marines you left behind after they'd been Wraith-stunned."

"What?"

"You just left them where they fell, where any Wraith could have come along and fed on them."

It took a moment for the memory to click into place and then he recalled the two _Daedalus_ marines whom Elizabeth had ordered to escort him to the ZedPm control room during the siege. With the darts scooping up people and dropping even more wraith into the city with every run, it had been imperative to get the shield raised as quickly as possible. Every moment's delay was costing lives and, in the end, every second had counted.

"I had to get the ZedPM installed or we'd have all have been dead. The Wraith darts made a kamikaze run on the city after--"

"You didn't know that at the time. You didn't give a shit about those men. You just left them there."

"I had to get the shield up to save everyone in the city."

"Oh, don't give me that crap, McKay. The only person you ever gave a shit about was yourself, and now two more good men will be heading back to Earth because of your pettiness and ego."

"What!? I saw..." Rodney clicked his fingers,"...Jacob-whatever in the gate room two days ago."

"I'm talking about Everett, you little shit."

"Everett?" Rodney squeaked. "When did he get into this conversation?"

Another shove and the door ahead opened at Rodney's approach, the fresh breeze off the sea smacked him in the face, the salt stinging his eyes. He was pressed onwards until he stood on the lower balcony overlooking the rolling blue waves that crashed into the city only ten feet below his feet, sending up a fine cold spray that splashed across his face.

"Colonel Everett was a good man and a fine officer, and he didn't deserve to get drained by a Wraith just because you were flying too high on stims to get those jumpers off the ground. And I know what happened with the ZPM. All that yapping brought the Wraith right to your position...and if you hadn't been such a goddamn coward then you'd have taken the time to hide those downed marines before you ran off with that Athosian bitch."

"You're blaming me for the Wraith getting into the city? Perhaps if your precious Colonel hadn't used up all our tactical nuclear warheads in one pointless defense strategy then we'd have had no need for the shield because there would have been no Wraith."

"Oh yeah, that's just like you, isn't it, McKay?" He sneered. "To pass the blame onto someone else...and if one Colonel wasn't a big enough notch on your belt, you nearly killed Colonel Sheppard too."

"Colonel Sheppard made his own stupid choice that day, just like Everett. If he had waited a few more minutes I'd have had the Chair up..."

"Don't you dare bad-mouth the Colonel. He's a goddamn hero... and you? You're just a liability to everyone in this city," he snarled, giving Rodney a hard shove.

Rodney shoved back. "The only liability here is you and your bullies."

"Yeah... and I've seen how you dealt with them."

"What? I had nothing to do with what happened to them."

"Yeah, sure. Halston just happened to fall down a flight of stairs after you'd taken a tumble, and Ericsson..."

"I had nothing to do with what happened to either of those men...not that they didn't deserve exactly what they got because we all know my fall was no accident and the shower gel..."

"Harmless pranks!"

"Harmless? I had a concussion... and an extreme allergic reaction to that--"

"And maiming them was justifiable retribution?" Saunders shoved him again and Rodney felt the balcony railing dig into his lower back. Flashes of memory struck at him, of this same balcony during the violent storm, of Kolya pressing him backwards over the railing while Elizabeth dragged at Kolya's arm to pull him off, of the pain in his sliced arm as the wet cloth of his jacket dragged across the bloodied wound. Saunders was right in his face now, his pale eyes dark and filled with rage and his face reddened with anger.

Rodney gritted his teeth, used a move that Teyla had taught him to break Saunders hold and push him off balance before shoving him back even harder, managing to gain some space between them. Incensed by Rodney's actions, Saunders slammed both hands against Rodney's shoulders, both of their eyes widening in shock when the force was enough to tip Rodney over the top of the railing. The split second seemed to stretch into infinity as he saw Saunders lunge forward to grab him. He felt Saunders's fingers brush against his legs as he tried but failed to grasp the material and then he was falling, the breath knocked out of him as he hit the water.

***

Saunders froze at the horror on McKay's face, realizing a split second too late what had happened. Yes, he wanted McKay to pay for Halston and Ericsson but the intention had been to intimidate the arrogant bastard into requesting a transfer back to Earth, not to hurt him. He lunged forward too late, his fingers grazing the heavy material of McKay's pants, almost catching a foot and then McKay was gone, arms flailing uselessly for a nonexistent handhold as he tumbled backwards into the sea, ten feet below. Saunders saw him go under, his eyes scanning the water until McKay surfaced, coughing and spluttering but Saunders could see he was dazed and struggling to stay afloat.

Saunders tapped his headset, toeing off his boots and pulling off his vest and jacket at the same time. "Control. This is Saunders at Grounding Station Three. McKay's in the water. I repeat. McKay's in the water. I'm going in after him."

Already aware that there was nothing he could use as a flotation device, Saunders ripped off his headset without waiting for a response and dived off the balcony into the rolling sea, coming up beside the thrashing scientist. When McKay tried to grab him too tightly, threatening to drag them both under, Saunders kicked away and came up behind the panicking man, grabbing hold of the collar of his waterlogged jacket to drag him onto his back while keeping his head above water.

"Relax, McKay!"

Amazingly, McKay did as he was ordered, letting the salty water provide the buoyancy needed to keep him afloat as Saunders dragged McKay back towards the city. He felt the first twinges of panic when he noticed the incredibly smooth sides, seeing no handholds within reach, and then a face appeared over the edge, followed by another.

When the empty leg of a pair of military pants dropped down in front of him, Saunders didn't bother to question the makeshift rope and grabbed for it. He could hear Sheppard and Lorne shouting down at him but the breeze tore away their words. He understood what they were trying to tell him anyway, that the 'rope' would never support the weight of one, let alone two waterlogged men. It was there to help keep them both afloat until more help arrived. What Saunders didn't expect was to see Sheppard jump into the water to support the other side of McKay, holding onto another makeshift rope made out of belts and a jacket. A sharp look from Sheppard put the fear of God into Saunders having never seen his CO's eyes blazing with so much anger before.

"S-sir...I n-never meant for this to happen. I-I s-swear."

"We'll talk..." he spat out some water "...about this later."

"Yes...s-sir." Saunders stumbled over his words as the coldness of the sea seeped into his body.

"Rodney? How you d-doing there?" Sheppard's voice gentled when he spoke to the still-dazed scientist.

"I've...b-been b-better."

"W-well, hold on. N-not long now...and we'll h-have you out of here."

Saunders looked up as a Puddlejumper swooped down and hovered right above them, the back hatch opening slowly. He could hear occasional snatches of words as Major Lorne yelled instructions up to those inside and he grabbed for the harness that dropped a few feet to the side of him, quickly fastening it around McKay. Two tugs of the rope and the Puddlejumper rose up into the air, carrying McKay out of the water. It maneuvered only far enough for Lorne to grab a hold of McKay and lower him to the balcony, releasing the harness so that the Puddlejumper could go back for the next man.

"You n-next, S-sir."

"J-just get that harness on, s-soldier...and that's an order."

By the time the harness dropped down beside him, his fingers were almost too numb from the cold to pull it around him. Eventually, he gave the required two tugs and breathed a sigh of relief as he was hoisted out of the sea, and even more grateful when his feet touched solid ground. He had not noticed the blankets dropped from the back of the jumper but was glad when he felt one placed over his cold shoulders. Moments later, Sheppard was in the air and being slowly lowered down to the balcony close by.

"Rodney?" That same gentle voice brought Saunders' head up and he saw Sheppard reach out to place a firm grip on McKay's shoulder. All traces of the irritation that had filled Sheppard's face since Doranda had gone, leaving behind the look of a man who was concerned for someone he cared a great deal about. Perhaps more than Sheppard would dare to admit.

"Amazingly...I'm o-okay." And though he looked terrible, soaked through to the skin and with his face pale and lips only just starting to lose that bloodless coloring, Saunders could see something shining in McKay's blue eyes that looked suspiciously like joy rather than pain. Major Lorne had pulled off McKay's jacket and wrapped one of the emergency blankets around him. He was crouched down between them but he turned a hard stare at Saunders, the tight line of his mouth and narrowness of his eyes promising that Saunders that this was far from over.

Saunders lowered his head, giving silent thanks that Sheppard and Lorne had turned up when they did, not wanting to dwell on the possibilities had they arrived even ten minutes later.

***

"I've said it before and I'll say it again. I'm fine, Carson."

"No you're bloody not. This is the third time you've graced my infirmary in two weeks so I don't care how fine you think you feel, you are staying in here overnight for observation... and that is final."

Rodney almost jumped when John dropped a friendly hand on his lower leg. "Face it, Rodney, you're not going anywhere tonight so just relax."

He had not seen John return to his side, having assumed Sheppard would walk away as soon as he knew Rodney was in no immediate danger, just as he had the last few times. Instead John settled into a chair beside him, an uneasy smile playing about his soft lips as if he expected Rodney to tell him to get lost at any moment, but Rodney had no intention of screwing up what might be his one and only opportunity to regain their friendship. If the past weeks had taught him anything at all, it was that he was only half a person without John. No matter how hard Carson, Teyla and even Miko tried, they couldn't come close to filling the void in his heart and soul from losing John. Without him, life had lost much of its joy, his discoveries had no shine when he could not share them with John, and even food tasted like sawdust without John's company. He had missed their bickering and snarking, had missed their conspiracies as they devised ways to have a little fun between all the death and gloom thrown at them in the Pegasus galaxy. He missed the silent moments too, when the pair of them would simply sit back, shoulder to shoulder, and watch the same old movie again.

And yet it was far more than that. He had missed seeing John's smile and the way his eyes glowed with pleasure whenever he teased him. He had missed his boyish humor and his laughter, and that glint in his eyes when he had an idea that would, no doubt, lead them both into trouble with Elizabeth. He had missed his touch too, those teasing smacks and slaps that came so infrequently now and more often in annoyance than in friendship, and the gentle hand on his shoulder or arm to guide him or simply call his attention.

Rodney offered a tremulous smile, not wanting to put too much hope in John's change of heart in case this was a temporary respite from the loneliness he had felt since losing John's trust. It must have been enough of a smile though as some of the tension slipped from John's frame and he slouched further into the seat. That tension returned suddenly when Carson gripped Rodney's shoulder and leaned in close and it took but a moment for Rodney to realize that the slightly narrowing of John's eyes was aimed at Carson and not him.

Was John jealous of Carson's attention towards him?

It hardly seemed possible but when Rodney thought back to the previous few times in the infirmary where John had walked away after giving him an angry glance, Carson had been hovering over him. At the time Rodney had assumed that John's attitude was purely more fallout from Arcturus but now he was not so certain. The thought that John might actually be jealous of Carson's friendship with him filled Rodney with even greater hope that he might be able to salvage theirs... unless John simply hated the idea of Rodney having any friends at all. Perhaps he had wanted him to be completely ostracized after Arcturus. Certainly, if Carson, Teyla and Miko had not made an effort to keep him company then he might have been forced to leave Atlantis rather than endure the loneliness as he had in Russia.

Some of his uncertainty must have shown because John's eyebrows rose and his eyes widened in what could only be remorse and, if Rodney did not know better, he could have sworn that John looked as though he was about to apologize to both him and Carson. Instead, his smile tightened and he looked down for a moment as if reining in his emotions before looking back up with a brighter smile which encompassed Carson too.

"So I hear the doc's been taking good care of you."

Carson snorted lightly. "I'm always taking care of Rodney. Trouble magnets, the both of you....though, if he calls me at two in the morning again to rub more cream into his back then I'm assigning Dr. Biro to take care of him in future."

"One time!" Rodney stated indignantly, holding up a finger. "You said I needed to rest but how could I when I was itching so much and couldn't reach... that spot."

"He fair near did my back in by making me lean over a chair to apply the medication."

"I could hardly lie down on the bed, Carson. The rash was on the front too." Rodney pointed out.

"Aye, that it was. And it seemed to be concentrated around a certain..."

"Carson!"

"...area." Carson smirked at Rodney, who had felt his face heat with embarrassment as Carson knew exactly how concentrated it was around his groin, though at least he had not tried to embarrass Rodney further by offering to apply the cream to that particularly itchy spot at the time. Anyway, Rodney could bet he was not the only man on Atlantis who liked a little solo action in the shower some mornings and used a little shower gel to ease the friction.

Judging by the squirm John made and the slightly pained expression, he must have guessed what area Carson meant anyway, which made Rodney blush even harder.

"Do you mind if we change the subject? I don't particularly want to discuss my personal ailments in public."

"Well, that'll make a nice change," John teased, and Rodney knew it was a tease rather than an acerbic observation because of the fine lines of mirth that crinkled at the corner of his eyes, and the gentle tilt of his lips. At that moment, Rodney knew everything was going to be good between them again and, for the first time in what seemed a long while, Rodney felt some of the tension leave his own body.

***

Eight days later, Saunders stood between the two beds holding his former team mates, deciding it was better to make rash promises of keeping in touch rather than souring the last few minutes of what had seemed a good friendship until the truth came out. Halston had admitted to setting a thin trip wire across the stairs, causing McKay's fall, while Ericsson had admitted to knowing all about McKay's allergies to particular compounds before tampering with his shower gel. Both had set out to deliberately hurt the man rather than simply annoy him, which had never been Saunders's intention. The three of them had played a number of minor pranks on the scientists but none had been truly malicious until Halston lost a friend in the Iratus bug nest.

Saunders had not been too happy when Ericsson made that little Japanese scientist ill, nor when Halston tampered with the equipment and hurt that Russian engineer, though the itching powder had been kind of funny.

Even so, he had thought McKay's accidents were just another couple of pranks that had misfired and he had been stunned by the violent backlash that put first Halston and then Ericsson in the infirmary and permanently off Atlantis. In hindsight, blaming McKay had been a little harsh as, for all of his sharp words, he was not the malicious type. If Sheppard knew who was behind the retaliation, and that seemed likely judging by his private but very persuasive words to the three of them, then he was keeping that information to himself. Halston and Ericsson had agreed to say their own injuries were caused by an accident rather than face a military hearing that could result in a dishonorable discharge for the part they had played in McKay's _accidents_.

As for himself, he thought he would be sent back to Earth along with Halston and Ericsson but, instead, Sheppard had decided to balance out the black mark that ought to have gone onto his permanent record against him jumping into the sea to save McKay, even though he had caused that fall. The only punishment given was an order to read a number of reports, both for offworld missions and for events in Atlantis, which revealed the critical role McKay had played in saving the expedition time and time again.

After reading the events leading up to the Wraith siege, he felt a little humbled at Colonel Everett's condescending attitude towards the scientists who had given all they had, and in some cases given their lives, to protect the city and each other. In light of what they had been through, Saunders now understood McKay's anger at Everett, brought on by tiredness and grief. He was a scientist not a soldier, and yet he and the others had been forced to defend themselves against a terrible enemy with little physical or mental preparation. They were all battle-weary, all low on sleep and high on stress, and none more so than McKay and Zelenka as they worked around the clock to ensure Atlantis would never be a Wraith stepping stone to Earth, even if it cost all their lives.

Colonel Everett had brought hope to the Atlanteans and then dashed it by refusing to accept advice from a bunch of geeks and a renegade USAF major. Saunders had been at the meeting where Everett went against Sheppard's advice to keep back some of the nuclear warheads. At the time, he had taken a lot of pleasure in seeing Everett assume military command from the Air force pilot who had admitted to killing Colonel Sumner but Everett had underestimated the enemy, and that personal vendetta against Sheppard had cost men's lives.

In hindsight, Saunders knew that his accusations against McKay were unfounded too. Bringing up the shield had been more important than the lives of two soldiers and blaming McKay had dishonored the sacrifice they had made when volunteering to escort him to the ZPM room. Perhaps a Wraith could have stumbled across them and taken their lives while they lay helpless but, all over the city, others were in the same terrible predicament and the only way to save as many of them as possible was to stop the Wraith from gaining reinforcements with every dart that came close enough to the city. If anything, those soldiers had failed McKay. They had failed to protect him and, in doing so, they had failed Atlantis too. Teyla Emmagan's report had revealed how close Atlantis had come to losing its one and only chance of salvation when McKay was left to face two Wraith alone.

He doubted that any of what he had learned would ever make him like the man but Saunders felt a lot more respect for McKay now.

Saunders stepped back and, seconds later, the Asgard transporter beam enveloped the two injured men. He stared at the empty beds for a moment and then turned, finding Major Lorne standing by the door, watching him closely.

"He's really not so bad once you get to know him."

"I'll take your word for it, Sir."

Lorne gave a wry smile, eyes flicking towards the empty beds. "Better mine than theirs."

A silent understanding passed between them and then Lorne turned away.

"Sir?"

He turned back with a slight frown that eased when Saunders saluted him. Lorne gave an offhand salute in return but he was smiling when he walked away this time.

***

Two weeks had passed since McKay's fall into the cold waters surrounding Atlantis and even though they had put the worst of Arcturus behind them, what they had regained was still not enough for John. Instead of falling back into the old patterns, Rodney had pulled away a little as if he could not risk placing all of his trust in John, but that was hardly surprising after the way John had treated him. Still, John had tried his best to accept that he had lost more of Rodney than he could ever have imagined.

Even selflessly wanting Rodney to be happy was tearing him apart because he wanted Rodney to be happy with him rather than with someone else. He wanted to be the one Rodney turned to when he needed someone to put medication on his itchy back, or when he needed reassurance that everything would turn out okay, or even just when Rodney wanted someone to discuss the latest hot gossip with.

Quite simply, he missed being the center of Rodney's universe but he knew he had only himself to blame.

Although Carson had implied that his relationship with Rodney was purely platonic--mixed in with a little doctor/patient--the image of Carson's gentle hands holding Rodney's and stroking Rodney's fine hair still left a bitter taste in John's mouth. He knew Carson was capable of lying about his relationship with Rodney if he believed it was in their best interest to keep it quiet, especially as the American military had a problem with same-sex couples, but he had hoped Rodney would tell him the truth.

Except John was not certain if he wanted to learn that he had already lost Rodney to Carson.

He glanced across as Rodney came to stand next to him on the balcony overlooking the city. There were other balconies that offered beautiful views across the sea and others of the sun and moons rising and setting above the spires of the city but John had always liked this particular view when he was feeling torn inside. From here he felt dwarfed by the great city, seeing along the straight avenues between the skyscraping buildings and yet taking comfort in their order. He had an urge to 'thread the needle' one of these days in a Puddlejumper and if Everett had not ordered him to the Chair during the siege then he might have taken to the air then to chase down the darts strafing the city with their culling beams.

Rodney leaned onto the balcony railing beside him, staring out into the city for a moment before John noticed him pushing upright and turning towards him.

"What are you doing?" Rodney asked gently.

John frowned as it seemed pretty obvious what he was doing right now. He half-turned towards Rodney and cocked an eyebrow at him in the hope that he might get a little more out of his friend. Rodney flapped his hand.

"I- ah. I don't mean standing out here as that's pretty obvious. I mean... Well... What are you...doing?" He grimaced as if only just realizing that his words still made no sense. "With us?"

"With us?"

"I mean, with Carson and me...and you."

"Carson?"

"Yes, Carson. Resident voodoo practitioner, wielder of large needles?"

"I know who Carson is, Rodney."

"Do you? I mean, do you really?"

John reached up and rubbed the back of his neck. He knew it was a nervous habit from when he was trying to work out what the hell was going on, especially when Rodney was being more obtuse than usual.

"Yeah. I think I know him well enough to..."

"So you know he's besotted with Cadman?"

"He's..?" John dropped his hand and licked his lips nervously, even more confused by the turn of the conversation. The _Daedalus_ had left an hour earlier on its trip back to Earth, weighed down by all the artifacts that could not be sent through the Stargate and with scientists and military returning home. Halston and Ericsson were among them but he had a strong feeling that no one would miss them. When Kavanagh had chosen to leave last time, John had heard of several parties in the Science section celebrating the event; he anticipated hearing the same for Halston and Ericsson. As for Lt. Cadman, she was a good soldier and a demolitions expert, much like Ford used to be, and if she had requested an assignment on Atlantis then John might have agreed if only to annoy Rodney but he knew Rodney had been uncomfortable with Cadman since the body-sharing experience. He also knew Cadman had liked Carson enough to use Rodney's body to make a death bed confession--barely resisting the urge to shudder at the memory--but had not realized that the interest went both ways. "Well, good for him."

"So the homophobic looks have got to stop."

"Homophobic?!" John looked straight at Rodney in shock. "Jeez, Rodney. I'm not homoph..."

"I kissed him once, Colonel. Once! And it wasn't even me in control of my body, it was Cadman."

"I thought we weren't gonna mention that again." John narrowed his eyes, hating the memory of Rodney kissing Carson.

"We're not. At least, I wasn't... but you don't seem to be able to get past it."

John stared hard at Rodney, seeing a flicker of fear in the vivid blue eyes. John knew he could be dense on occasion, rarely seeing the flirting and come-hither signs until it was too late but, at other times, he had flashes of insight. He had one now as Rodney's words finally penetrated. There was no Rodney and Carson but there was...

"This isn't about Carson, is it? It's about you."

"What!?" Rodney looked stunned at the proclamation.

"It is," John crowed, stabbing a finger at Rodney. "You think I'm being homophobic and you're scared in case I turn that...homophobia against you."

Rodney looked all flustered, making denying noises but his expressive eyes said something else entirely. John's grin faded when his brain caught up with his mouth, realizing how this had to look and sound to Rodney. For some reason, John had always known Rodney liked guys as well as girls despite his louder talk on the merits of blondes, dumb or otherwise as the case may be. Otherwise he would never have been jealous of Carson's relationship with Rodney in the first place. However, Rodney did not know that. Now doubt Rodney thought John was a straight guy having a homophobic reaction towards a mutual friend, towards Carson. He had never expected John to twist it around and point the finger, quite literally, at him instead. He could see Rodney spiraling down into a full-blown panic attack and did the only thing he could think of to convince Rodney that his fears of John hating him for his sexual preferences were groundless. He caught Rodney's face in his hands, leaned in fast and kissed him, hard and determined.

After months of wondering what it would feel like to have Rodney's mouth beneath his, John was overcome with the taste and feel of the soft lips that had parted in surprise. He gave one tentative lick to tease across Rodney's lips and then pulled back, having stopped the panic attack dead in its tracks.

Rodney stared at him in complete bewilderment, a finger moving to skim across his own lips.

"You...You..?"

"Yeah, Rodney. I kissed you."

"Then you're not..?" He waved a hand

"Homophobic? No. Jealous of Carson..?" John knew he was pulling a funny face but it was astonishingly difficult to admit to having fallen foul of that particular sin. "Maybe."

That seemed to break the enchantment as Rodney's stunned expression turned to disbelief. "Maybe? Maybe! You were *so* jealous of Carson... though I admit, at the time, I thought... mmummph!"

John grabbed Rodney again and kissed him hard, this time with his tongue stabbing into the open mouth, licking and tasting, sliding against Rodney's to silence him. Rodney broke free. "We need to tal...mmummph!" John caught his lips again, effectively silencing him for a second time. When Rodney broke free for a third time, John simply grabbed him both ears. "Rodney? Shut up!"

This time Rodney did as ordered, melting into the heat of John's kiss, his arms wrapping around John's torso, holding him so tight that he might have crushed a more fragile frame. This was exactly what John needed and wanted, and what he had been missing for almost two decades. Memories of being held down by strong arms, of bruising kisses and a roughened cheek against his skin flooded back. With Rodney he could let go, not needing to temper his strength for fear of hurting his partner. He felt fingers digging into his scalp, dragging through his hair as Rodney lost his uncertainty and reciprocated with equal passion. Their mouths slid apart; lips, tongue and teeth striping a path of pain and pleasure along his jaw and down the side of his throat. He gasped as Rodney bit into the flesh at the juncture of neck and shoulder, knowing he was marked below the collar and so not caring. His own hands had worked under the jacket and found the hem of Rodney's t-shirt, slipping beneath to stroke the incredibly soft skin, fingers mapping the contour of muscle and curve of ribcage as he threw his head back to give Rodney greater access to his vulnerable throat.

Voices drifting out from the corridor beyond brought him back to his senses and he pulled away from Rodney, knowing they would be stupid to carry on with this out here where anyone could walk in on them. For a moment he froze, staring deep into Rodney's dazed eyes, seeing the heightened color on his cheeks and passion-swollen lips that seemed to beg for more kisses.

"What say we take this somewhere... private?"

Rodney gave an almost breathless laugh. "Yeah. What say we."

John sent Rodney off first, wanting to have a moment or two to regain his senses before he ventured out into the hallways of Atlantis. Rodney could get away with looking all flustered and excited because it wasn't so unusual a state for him, though John doubted anyone would suspect what had Rodney all excited about this time. John, on the other hand, had an image to maintain. He took a couple more deep breaths, feeling his heart rate slow closer to normal. He checked his collar to hide the incriminating love bite and stepped back into Atlantis, walking swiftly through the corridor with a determined expression that discouraged any attempts to waylay him. Rodney's door opened to his soft request for admittance and John stepped inside, closing and locking the door behind him. Rodney was nowhere to be seen but John could hear him in the bathroom.

The last few minutes had dampened the intense desire that had coursed through him on the balcony but he knew it would not take much to stoke the fire again. Silently, he prayed Rodney was not having second thoughts. His breath caught in his throat when Rodney appeared on the threshold. He had pulled off his boots and socks, and discarded his jacket, looking strangely vulnerable in just pants and t-shirt even though John must have seen him similarly dressed on numerous occasions.

With slow movements, John pulled off his own jacket and toed off his boots, never letting his eyes stray from Rodney's face. He walked towards Rodney and reached out to rub a thumb over the prominent peak of a nipple showing through the thin t-shirt, smiling when Rodney shivered at his touch. He had always wondered if those nipples were as sensitive as they looked. Now he had part of his answer but John was determined to discover the full answer before the night was through.

"Take it off."

Rodney's eyebrows rose at the low-spoken order but, for once, he obeyed immediately and without questioning, drawing the t-shirt over his head and banishing it to the floor. John had licked his lips, watching the play of muscle as Rodney discarded the t-shirt, his fingers itching to toy with the fine, brown chest hairs scattered across the top half of the broad, muscular chest and down the center, tapering out midway. The hairs were not as dense as his nor did they cover as wide an area, leaving the rosy-colored nipples free of chest hairs. John gave in to temptation and trailed a finger through the fine hairs, brushing across the silken flesh lying beneath. His finger circled a nipple, hearing Rodney's breath hitch as he skimmed the sensitive nub. John smiled as he gained his answer and leaned in to lap at the tightened nipple, feeling Rodney's hands sink into his hair but whether to push him away or draw him nearer, John could not be certain. He felt the hands slide down to tug at the hem of John's t-shirt, the meaning clear. John pulled back and skinned out of his t-shirt quickly, throwing it aside. After several aborted hand gestures, Rodney reached out to stroke through John's thick chest hair, fingers tangling in the chain holding his dog tags. He looked up, with blue irises just a thin rim around the enlarged pupils, and spoke hesitantly.

"Perhaps we should...errhh... get naked? Both of us."

The flush of embarrassment rose in his cheeks and John wondered if perhaps Rodney was not as knowledgeable about gay sex as John had believed. Certainly, he seemed far more timid that John expected but, if anything, that made John relax. His own experiences might have been in his teens but his partner had been older and more worldly-wise, teaching John more than enough about the different pleasures two men could have together. Perhaps Rodney's experiences had been a little less varied; a hand-job or even just rubbing off against one another. If so then John was going to have a lot of fun teaching him the rest, especially when it came to putting that amazing mouth to better use than talking.

John responded to Rodney's words by reaching for his zipper and lowering it slowly. His baggy pants refused to stay up and slid down his narrow hips to pool at his feet. John stepped out of them and cocked his head at Rodney, eyes settling below Rodney's waist. Rodney's usually agile fingers fumbled at his clothing but John remained still, mesmerized by the ethereal glow of Rodney's creamy flesh and the tantalizing glimpses of more as Rodney finally dropped both pants and boxers, revealing strong, pale thighs and a beautiful cock jutting upwards from a nest of brown curls.

Beautiful was the only word John could find to describe the man standing naked opposite him. Months of offworld missions, sometimes running for their lives but more often simply hiking long distances, had burned off fat to leave mainly muscle though John was relieved to see softness around Rodney's middle. That little imperfection made him real, made all of this real, and all John wanted to do was drop to his knees and worship the beauty of this man, of his friend and soon-to-be lover.

He grinned as Rodney became nervous under John's stare, his smile turning predatory as he stalked forward, watching Rodney take a couple of hesitant steps back towards the bed. When he judged Rodney was close enough, John pounced, knocking him back on to the bed with John straddling his thighs. Desire-darkened eyes were wide in shock but then a familiar eye roll ruined the helpless prey image as Rodney gave a crooked smile before stretching up for a kiss. John obliged him, swooping down to seal their lips together while he ran his hands over the ample, warm and silken flesh covering Rodney's pelvic bones. He felt the reverberation of a soft moan as their hard cocks rubbed together, caught between the close press of their bodies. John rocked his hips slowly, pushing against the soft belly as he reveled in the sensations building deep in his own belly and groin. Fingers tightened on his biceps and John pulled back slightly.

"Iwantyouinmewhenyoucome." The words were a rush with Rodney's face stained red with embarrassment, and the request surprised John for a moment as he had managed to convince himself that Rodney was a virgin in that respect. He could feel the increased pounding of his heart at the offering, knowing he wanted this desperately but had been willing to work up to it slowly.

"Are you sure, Rodney?"

Rodney's lips tightened into a sour line or irritation. "IF I wasn't certain then I wouldn't have asked."

"Okay...just checking we're not getting ahead of each other here."

"Oh." The irritation flooded away, replaced by concern. "Umm...if you'd rather not then..."

John stopped his words with a kiss, having already discovered that it was an effective method of silencing Rodney; he drew back. "Oh, I want to. I really want to."

He let Rodney choose the position, willing to let Rodney decide how he wanted his body taken and was not surprised when Rodney turned over onto elbows and knees, raising his pure white ass high into the air. John ran his hands over the pale curves, wondering why he had never noticed that Rodney had the most gorgeous ass hidden beneath his baggy science pants--firm and beautifully formed into perfect handfuls. He took his time preparing Rodney, listening to the soft moans and gentle litany of, "Yes' and "more," that told him when Rodney was ready. Slowly, as if holding a most precious possession, John withdrew his fingers and aligned his cock, pressing in with infinite care. He had forgotten how incredibly tight and hot it felt to be inside another man, feeling the heat and pressure along the whole length of him as he pressed in all the way. Beneath him, Rodney moaned, pain and pleasure mingling as he pushed back in counterpoint to John's small thrusts.

John reached beneath Rodney, touching him for the first time, his hand wrapping around the silken steel length of Rodney's erection, jacking him slowly in time with his own thrusts into the perfect body. He could feel Rodney trembling beneath him, could hear a keening wail building up in the back of Rodney's throat. Part of him wanted to pull Rodney upright, wanted to draw him onto his lap so he could fuck him harder and deeper, so he could reach the exposed chest and belly and tease at an oversensitive nipple even as Rodney thrust hard into John's hand. Or maybe Rodney would play with his own body, bringing himself off even as he impaled himself deeper onto John's cock. The image alone was enough to push John over the edge and he came with a shout of triumph, thrusting harder and deeper, wanting to crawl right up inside his lover and stay there forever, only to come crashing back down to Earth with the heat of Rodney's release coating his fingers and their heavy gasps filling the sweat and sex-scented air.

He collapsed down on top of Rodney, having the presence of mind to pull out and roll aside moments later when Rodney squirmed beneath him. John discarded the used condom and pulled Rodney into his arms, chest to Rodney's back; he kissed the sweat-slicked nape of his lover's neck. Rodney murmured softly.

"That was...that was..."

"Perfect," John finished.

"Hmmm...Perfect." Rodney whispered in agreement, voice heavy with fatigue. "I'm gonna...take a short nap now."

"Sure. Okay." John could feel the tiredness pulling on his own limbs and mind, knowing it was more than just the sex causing it. For years he had denied himself the company of another man, and for months he had denied himself the presence of his best friend. Having both in his arms was like coming home after a lifetime of loneliness, easing all the inner aches and pain that he had become so much a part of him that he had learned to ignore the gnawing inside him until Rodney brought it all back to the forefront of his mind.

John felt Rodney relax in his arms, listening as his breathing slowed into a gentle rhythm as he slipped into sleep. He tightened his arms around this most precious man, part of him still convinced that this was all a dream and that, if he closed his eyes then when he awoke, Rodney would be gone and the misery of the past few months would still be with him.

John knew that the shadow of Arcturus would not be so easily banished despite his inherent optimism. They had both crossed the line that day and there would be times when he recalled the mistakes they had both made, bringing back some of the anger and bitterness. They both had a little way to go before they regained the same level of trust in each other as before that cataclysmic event but, as he tightened his hold on Rodney, he knew they would put Arcturus behind them--eventually.

THE END


End file.
